Day 40: Inspiration from Courtney

“Since I first became aware of Peter Rollins’s work in 2018, I’ve come to see embracing of contradiction/Lack as vital. Where I initially found it not only unrelate-to-able but downright antithetical to my paradigm, I now perceive it as the greatest freeing I could possibly experience. It’s liberation from running myself down in my head. It’s liberation from the exhaustion of forcing myself to chase after “becoming a better person.” It’s liberation from society’s neverending demand that I figure out and then raggedly chase whatever it is that makes me truly happy.

It is also liberation from religion’s relentless, crushing pressure to “obey God, improve my relationship with God, please God, be perfect.”

McGowan’s way of presenting it all feels very accessible to me. My problem, as ever, is the how. What’s the practical side? How do I turn tarrying with contradiction into something that’s more than a mental/meditative exercise? Practices such as AfL do, in a strange way, “recenter” me to remaining decentered. (YAY, PARADOX.) But I need more than a yearly Lenten practice. I need a frequent, regular “Sabbath” of pyrotheological decentering, something that grows me into true satisfaction with and enjoyment of[…]”

Excerpt From

Appetite for Antithesis: (De)Knowing God in a Lenten Practice

Courtney Cantrell

Today, I just want to share some inspiration from Courtney.  I am still plowing through her book and enjoying the journey.  I am so glad she is walking alongside my last AFL.  

One more week.  

Day 39: Send me a dog!

It's bed time and I don't have much energy to write anything profound.  Maybe that will come tomorrow.  We have one more week...  

I am grateful, and tired.   It's time to move on soon.  My head needs a refresh and a different direction.  

There is nothing like a Naked Pastor cartoon to fill the empty void in my inspiration.  

Day 38: Sacrifice?: Jesus had a bad weekend.

I said I'd be back... but with what conclusion.  Slavoj Žižek made me laugh...   But was that the point.  

He's funny, but wasn't I supposed to take away more than just his humour.  

So instead of reflecting on his humour, I thought I would redirect to someone whose job it was to make me laugh and also reflect.  David Hayward, aka the Naked Pastor, is a cartoonist.  It is coming up on the end of AFL.  This Sunday is Poplar Sunday .  So I went looking for a cartoon from The Naked Pastor.  

This one reminded me of something Matt Dillahunty said about the whole crucifixion, resurrection event.  

"What was the sacrifice?  Jesus had a bad weekend."  It went something like that.  David Hayward illustrated it perfectly.  I guess that question has yet to be discussed or pondered, much less answered.  

There were a lot of things that came up for question with the narrative of Christianity for me.  This is one that still sits in my cranium begging to be asked and discussed.  The same question is asked in a song in the musical "Jesus Christ Superstar."  (The 2012 Arena Tour is my favourite. ) 

"Who are you, what have you sacrificed?"  

I am looking forward to making that my continued Good Friday tradition.  Andrew Lloyd Webber dared ask the question. 

Day 37: What is

I saw the moon this morning... and then I didn't see the moon.  It is almost full.  In two days it will be full.  This is what a google search told me about Friday's full moon.  

"The first full moon of spring — the pink moon — will light up the night sky on Friday, April 12, 2025. Although it won't actually appear pink, this full moon is named after the early blooming pink phlox flowers, which signal the arrival of springtime."

I've never heard the first full moon of spring referred to the pink moon.  It didn't look very pink this morning, but I will have to keep my eye on it to see if I can see pink.  

There is "what is"

There is "what I believe about what is"

There is "what some say that it is"

There is "what I believe about what some say that it is"

There is "what I see"

There is "what I believe about what I see"

There is what is

* * * 

Today's reflection title bothers me... so much so that I don't want to listen to the reflection.  

"Why only an Atheist can believe". Slavoj Žižek.  

I am already surmising that each word gets reinterpreted under another set of standards.  He doesn't stipulate in the title "what" the Atheist can only believe.  There is the conundrum.  The reader has to already assume meaning based on lack of specifics.  

I looked up my AFL history and didn't find any inspiration from Žižek over the past years.  Not every voice inspires me.  But since this is my last year of AFL... maybe I need to give this voice a chance.  Even though I am skeptical about his premise from the get go.  

I am in for a long listen.  This sound bite is two hours long.  Yikes.  I guess this will be something I will have to chew on for a while.  I will be back... if I make it through the two hours. And even if I don't make it through... I will be back ...  Even if that means tomorrow.  I think we will get two days to chew on Žižek. 

Day 36: Messengers of Love covered in fur.

 

Love looks different at my house.  Love shows up with fur and four legs.  Love doesn't come when we want it to,  There is no demanding love.  It just comes and brings with it a peace that fills our hearts and our home.  This morning five messengers of love showed up for my husband in the early morning hours.  He needed some extra love today.  Mostly it is only one or two, but this morning when my husband needed it... five messengers showed up.  

They come for the bird seed we have on a plate that we can observe from our kitchen window.  That's right... these messengers of love like bird seed.  They almost never show up in the daylight hours.  They come when it's dark.  Like the stars... their beauty is only visible at night.  

I won't ever see love as ethereal anymore.  Love has air in its lungs and a warm beating heart in its body.  And sometimes love comes covered in fur.  

Day 35: At least the sky has something to say

 Sometimes there are no words to share.  So I am thankful there was a sunset.  At least the sky has something to say tonight.  

Day 34: Not much to share today

"Larch Valley" by Alison Philpotts (StumpCraft Puzzles) 

Day 34: The Torment of Saying Nothing 

Two weeks left.  I think I am coasting now.  When I read posts from past years, I see a lot of "I don't know if I will make it" moments.  Today was Richard Boothby day... and my posts in 2023 about Boothby had me more mesmerized with his story than his philosophy.  I'm not sure that is the goal of the AFL journey.  I am supposed to soaking up more than the stories.  

This week looks like the voice are more alive than dead.  So that is encouraging.  It's nice to see that we haven't had to bury everyone on this journey.  It is nice to see that the world is still producing some great minds.  

I don't have much to share today.  And I'm not really tormented by that... sorry Boothby!  Maybe tomorrow will more inspirational.